Glimpses of Life (6): Dreams
“Bubba, we are going to dream today.”
He looks aimlessly around, searching for the man who would sit in the chair every morning and give him a “love down”, that special rub-down from daddy to doggie. Now he looks at me, and sighs.
He will guide my dreams, and me.
This morning while still in bed, I pondered the bigger decisions in life, like where to live and what to do with the rest of my time here. When the first email arrives in my inbox–about how I am exactly where God wants me to be.
Yes, I am.
The second one was a post on grief, and dreaming, and to continue to dream today.
Grief tries to kill my dreams by saying it’s too soon to dream.
If I don’t dream, I’LL JUST DIE.
I am reading in the first part of Matthew today. It is all on dreams.
Multiple times, through dreams, both Joseph and Magi are directed/guided…
One step at a time
One day at a time
Moment by moment their dreams kept them alive, for if not for the dream, they would have died.
The last time I touched you, I felt the cold set in. The heat had left your body.
I rub the box of your remains as if you feel my touch. I know you are not really there, but in reality you are.
It comforts the deep longing to have you near. I look at the warmth of the fireplace insert. The one you gave me on our last anniversary together.
I ache so deeply.
Last night I cried uncontrollably as I lay on the bed. It may have been the three glasses of wine that released the pent-up emotional toll underneath. I don’t know.
I miss your touch. Everything I see reminds me of you.
Your loud clap that would last seconds after the last one clapping, would cause my head to cower in embarrassment. I long to be brought head-low by your performance.
Instead my head bends at the grief of your passing.
Two weeks, plus one day.
When will I stop counting the days past, and instead look forward to the days in front of me?
And further still, to the day when I see your face in front of mine, and I slowly reach out and touch the warmth of your cheek?