
I’ll Know When I Get There
I’m sitting here on the bed in the hotel room, after a long day of driving. Another five hours in front of me today when I reach my first destination– a couple days with one of my closest friends.
After that, I head East to North Carolina. Why? I am not sure.
It began with a nudge, “Go there.”
You won’t know why you’re going there until you are there.
I’m signed up for a conference, or should I say waiting list of one in the area I attended a few years ago. I will make my way there and wait in the parking lot, for a phone call? I don’t know.
…
Yesterday’s drive was so different than one I made shortly after Bill died. I attempted a road trip to Michigan, with Bill’s ashes alongside. We made it as far as Tennessee.
It was awful. I sobbed for miles and minutes and hours, devastated. I made it to the same friend’s home, and turned back for home. In a way it was successful as I fought paralyzing fear, and won.
This morning I sit in the same town, yet I am no longer the same.
A song came on the radio yesterday, one I can’t remember when I last heard it–likely the 90’s.
I knew the words, they were tucked deep within. I sang and beat the steering wheel with such elation–likely embarrassing the traffic around me. I don’t care.
The road in front of me.
The destination unsure.
Freedom.
I know this girl, the one slowly coming back to life. The one who would move across the states on a whisper from within, and above. The one driven along by this Unseen, yet very seeable, God.
Oh, how I’ve missed her.
…
I bring him along for the journey in a photo, and in my heart. He sits on the nightstand, likely smiling as he watches from a place I’ll make it to one day in the who-knows-when future.
Love this!!
Girl, I miss you so much! Coffee! Soon!
You go girl! Here’s to your adventures! Enjoy this freedom!
So thankful you are feeling this freedom. Only God…
Thank you Rose, It has been freeing indeed.