Do We Know THIS God?
A special moment happened on my birthday nearly two years ago. It was a few months after Bill died, the time when grief was all-consuming, and felt never-ending. It is during this time I experience God in unexpected ways I never believe possible. THIS God, this one who, when I cry out in distress, answers my plea with a moment so special I still choke up.
THIS God, the one who cares so much, holds us close, comforts in ways unique to us, is the same God who parts seas, writes commandments, and gives up His Life so we may live.
Do we know THIS God?
September 11, 2017:
Early on in our relationship, Bill would present me with fancy jewelry for a special occasion like a birthday or anniversary. Usually his taste was a tad “blingy” and I would either return it for something less flashy, or it would make its way to a nice drawer for storage after an acceptable time of wear.
Over time he caught on and figured out my style, or lack thereof.
I prayed this morning a plea from my aching heart:
“God give me something from him…a word…something…please.”
This day has been unexpectedly difficult. I guess I thought since it wasn’t his birthday, I was going to be fine, instead, I have have been emotionally unprepared for the sadness that has risen to the surface to destroy any celebration.
How naive I am.
I know the upcoming anniversary in December is already met with sadness even though it is still a distance off on the calendar. In prep I have a plan in place to battle the anticipated pain.
But today, God, knowing I was going to struggle when I was clueless, met me on my path.
I spot the gold object near my feet as I jog along the shoulder of the road, trying to keep clear of oncoming morning traffic. At first glance I think it is a gold ribbon.
But taking a play from Moses and the burning bush, I turn and walk back for a closer look.
It is a gold chain.
I pick it up and investigate it for damage, wondering if someone accidentally lost this prized possession. It is bent up in multiple places.
I unzip my handheld storage/water bottle to place it in there…
When I notice an inscription circling the entire necklace:
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
Three words I long to hear, I see.
I look at the gaudy, gold object and smile. This would be something Bill would have eyed at a jewelry store, I am sure of it.
Thank you Lord.